Why criticism hurts

by Paul on 13 January 2010 · 1 comment

Alchemy for Managers Weekly Tip – guest post from Paul Matthews.

We all know about criticism and the damage it can 
do to us – to our confidence and self esteem. 
But what is criticism and how is it different to 
feedback?

The simplest way to tell the difference is to 
consider who the comments will benefit. 

Are they for the benefit of the giver or the 
receiver?

What is Feedback?

Feedback is for the benefit of the receiver Its 
purpose is to help them grow and develop, and 
reinforce positive behaviour or actions. It is 
designed to help and support, and focuses on how to 
learn from the situation in order to move forward.

On the other hand, criticism always benefits the 
giver. In most cases, it is done to make the giver 
feel in some way superior to the receiver. It is 
often negative and judgmental. It is in many cases 
subjective rather than objective and it is usually 
destructive. It is most likely to make the recipient 
feel defensive, angry or hurt – emotions which stifle 
learning and growth. Criticism is also often used to 
apportion blame and to offload negative feelings.

Article by Paul Matthews

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