Last week I came up with a simple diagram I thought was quite helpful as a way of thinking about making feedback as useful as possible. I was thinking about 360 degree feedback when I came up with it, but I realise it could equally apply to any similar type of conversation; appraisals, tough conversations with a colleague, advice to friends and family (scary place to go!), and of course, 360 degree feedback.
The diagram is really simple, and it seems blindingly obvious when you see it graphically. Of course feedback will be more useful if it’s specific. And why would you not want it to be totally honest? What use is it to anyone if its not? (OK, perhaps not ‘brutally’ honest, but honest nevertheless). So I started wondering why I should even think it worth writing about if it is so bloody obvious.
And it’s because, clear as it may seem in theory, people still find it difficult to give honest, specific feedback when it comes to putting it into practice. We all do at times. Sometimes it’s because we know the person receiving the message is a bit touchy and inclined to go off ‘pop’ when they don’t like what they hear. If this is the case, it’s worth pointing out to that person that this sort of reaction is not only unhelpful to the person giving them feedback, it’s also entirely unproductive for them. Once they’ve done this a couple of times, people will stop wanting to give them feedback, or will just give them the watered down version which isn’t really all that helpful at all.
We’ve all been guilt of overreacting at times (and I raise my hand here – yes, I’ve done that at times) . We all have bad days and sometimes the timing of these conversations isn’t quite what we’d like. But, if we can contain our explosive outbursts when we feel annoyed, we’ll get a far better result in the long run. In fact, taking into account how difficult many people find it to give open feedback, I’d go even further and say it should be received with respect and gratitude. Hackneyed as it may sound – feedback is a gift.
[Tip: If you're designing a 360 degree feedback system, and you haven't already read it, this post on the importance of confidentiality may be useful]
Photo credit: net_efekt
Article by Vandy Massey
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